Dear Yellow Pages, Qwest and Verizon*
I think it’s great that people still use things like a phone book to look up a number. But I a) hate talking to anyone on the phone so much that I let my answering machine get EVERYTHING b) won’t call anyone unless I absolutely have to, and usually know the number already c) don’t mind paying $.50 for 411 if it saves me time and effort rather than hauling out a 6lb book and trying to find the number and searching through 1000 pages for something, and d) I HAVE THE FREAKING INTERNET!!
As you can see, I don’t need any more phone books. I don’t even need ONE, and certainly not the five I’ve gotten in the last month. So please stop leaving them on my doorstep, because then I just have to take them straight to the recycler — which is all the way across the apartment complex. So I have to take the damn things down to my car, drive to the recycler, get out, put the damn things in, and drive back home. I don’t like it. And I bet your poor delivery guy doesn’t like hauling them up the three flights to my apartment either. So please, for my sake, for his sake, stop sending them to me.
Sincerely,
Meljean, your customer who is living in (and enjoying) the twenty-first century.
…actually, Yellow Pages and Qwest, I’m not your customer. So I’m pretty sure tossing 48lbs of paper at my door is illegal or something. Paper harassment.
* I have trouble remembering the final comma in a set of serial commas. This was brought to my attention in the latest round of copy-edits. I also have a tendency to over-semi-colon. Did I mention that my copy-editor rocked? I had to stet very, very few changes, and most of those were style issues or words that I wanted to keep (for example, Mumbai vs. Bombay — Savi says Mumbai, Colin says Bombay, and it fits their backgrounds. I understand the reasoning behind switching them all to Mumbai, but I’m stubborn about dumb little things like that. Or Colin using “forgot” instead of “forgotten”, and Savi “opens” and “closes” the lights instead of turning them on and off.) Anyway. All of her suggestions and changes were great, and smoothed out/clarified some of my more tortured sentences — of which there were several *g*
You know, I hate talking on the phone, too. I’m such an un-girly girl. The only person I don’t mind talking to more than, like, three minutes to is my mother, and her I can chat with nearly an hour if I’m in the mood. Even when the hubby calls from work just to say hi, I’m kind of abrupt. I’d rather talk in person or send e-mails.
Does that make me totally weird?
But I do still use the phone book on occasion, especially if I’m looking up the number of someone who lives in my town. Don’t know why I don’t just internet it?
Hey we open and shut the water and lights all of the time. Tell me does Savi dring soda or pop? Or mineral water? Does she , you know what, on the sofa, couch, or davenport?
omg I open and close the water and the lights too! And when I was in Mumbai/Bombay I heard a very heated discussion about “Mumbai” vs “Bombay”! ALL OF YOUR POSTS RESONATE WITH ME! …
Looks like we get the same stuff at the same time – I just threw my phone book in the recycle pile. ugh. As for the rest, I have no clue!
CindyS
I so expect you to answer if I call. Just saying *g*
Ugh! They must have hit the whole Portland neighborhood! I ended up with four, yes, four, phone book deliveries! I don’t even use one.
I even called them, but they were not impressed to hear my tale of a recycle bin overflowing with thick yellow unopened books….What a waste. They should know that Portland-people care about the amount of paper they waste, if nothing else!
Consumers can “opt out†of receiving telephone books at http://www.YellowPagesGoesGreen.org. We will contact the publishers and inform them to stop delivering books. This is a free service for consumers. http://www.YellowPagesGoesGreen.org is working with state and local governments on ordinances concerning the delivery of unsolicited telephone books. http://www.YellowPagesGoesGreen.org is not against the telephone books but against the delivery of 4 to 5 pounds of paper on people’s door step 5 to 6 times per year and being told it is our responsibility to recycle something we did not ask for. If we need a book we will call. Otherwise I “opt out†from receiving it.