Dear people in the Portland metro area
I’m sorry, but if I’m driving at night through your neighborhood, and you’ve got your lights on and your curtains open, I will look in.
I kind of can’t help myself. But even if I could, I probably would look in, anyway, because I’m always fascinated by the inside of other people’s houses … even when this habit has led to my seeing certain scenes that I’d rather not have seen, including one in my in-laws’ neighbors’ bedroom that left me incapable of humping my husband for a month. And if you’ve ever seen my husband with his shirt off,* you would know that was a nasty, nasty scene, indeed.
Also, if you are reading a book, I will contort my body and my eyeballs any way possible to see the title and author. That isn’t me being nosy, I swear — it’s part of my job.
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*I really hope that you haven’t.
I do this too. Only I walk the dog at night, so I have more time to see in as I’m passing.
I do this as well. We live in an area where many houses leave curtains or blinds open, which simultaneously thrills and horrifies the nosey cow in me. This is the area where almost everyone walks.
The most memorable is the one, a few years ago in Newcastle, where a teenage boy humped a large soft toy on the sofa. A friend – she claimed she didn’t realise she was doing this – banged on a window, attracting his attention. The poor boy was so shocked that he froze in middle of humping the large innocent looking teddy big for a few seconds.
Once he registered that we saw what he was doing, he dashed, seemingly, for the door but pretty much fell flat on his face because his jeans and pants were at his ankles. He struggled to yank up the jeans while crawling across the floor and finally, still on knees with his bum naked, he slapped on the light switch, turning off the room light. As I shoved the friend to walk on, the blinds crashed down.
It was epic. We theorised he was so horny that he didn’t thinking of pulling down the blinds. It remains her favourite story to share at parties.
I also look at book covers, especially when watching films when characters read books. Almost all romantic comedy films tend to feature romantic novels, oddly enough. I was absolutely thrilled when I spotted on Penny Jordan’s name on a book cover during a train scene in a Japanese action film.
*bear, not big. Sorry. *blaming it on this unholy hour of the morning*
Perhaps we should call it the “open windows open books” club. I am especially bad with books. I must, must, must know what you are reading and how you like it.
Most impressed moment: Seeing someone read Lord of the Rings on the beach.
Guilty. (She holds her hand up somewhat sheepishly.)
I grew up in Portland and believe me, I’ve seen just about everything. I think nosiness runs in the family. In fact, my mother had a pair of binoculars she swore were for “bird watching”. Strangely all the birds in the neighborhood lived at our next door neighbor’s house…
It amazes me how many people in London leave their curtains open and lights on at night. Unfortunately my neighbors are terribly boring and generally spend their evenings in exciting pursuits such as watching the telly and munching digestive biscuits.
Oh, and I spy on people in the tube to find out what they’re reading. If they’re sitting close enough, I’ll even read the page they’re on to see if it’s interesting.
I’m fairly certain they don’t notice.
Maybe I’ve a future as a spy?
I think everyone does it, I mean how can you not look? Though I would appreciate it if my neighbors had blinds on their bedroom windows. Ugh.. that is one area I would rather not see.
I use to look through peoples widows until the cops asked me to stop…Just playin. But yes I would glance inside if a window was open. Sometimes curiosity gets the better of us