Meljean Brook

Want to get on the L.U.R.V.E. Train, and get a chance to win copies of Demon Moon, and a triple-digit or seven double-digit Amazon gift certificates? Find out how.

Dear People Magazine,

Every November, you come out with your “Sexiest Man Alive” issue; every spring, you print your list of the “World’s Most Beautiful People.”

But in 2007 — for the last two hundred years — the sexiest man and the most beautiful person has been … a vampire.

George? Pffft. Brad? Come on! Jude? …no.

Why isn’t it that Colin Ames-Beaumont hasn’t graced your cover? Is it simply because his picture cannot be taken? (He’s so beautiful a blank cover with just his name on it would make your readers drool.) Because he usually only comes out at night? (How is that different than Johnny Depp?) Because you think he hasn’t bared his assets for a Hollywood camera?

Are you afraid of his tainted blood? You shouldn’t be: one look will not send you to the Chaos realm, surrounded by flying dragons and the screams of the damned. Only Colin sees that realm when he looks into a mirror — it will not trouble you. Is it the woman he’s falling in love with? Geeks need love, too, People Magazine — a fact you have long overlooked (but that is another campaign to be won.)

Is it the fear that if you met him in a dark alley, the words “Oh my God you’re so beautiful!” would hardly be past your lips before he had you up against the wall for some hot sexing that you wouldn’t remember the next day?

No; none of those things are true impediments to being called “the sexiest” or “the most beautiful”. I think the problem is that you’ve been stuck on one pesky little word in the “Sexiest Man” title: Alive.

But there are those of us — readers and authors, geeks and norms — who know that Undead can be just as sexy as Living. And we’ve got hundreds of paranormal romances to prove it.

So I’m beginning my campaign to get a vampire on the cover of your magazine. To no longer be forced to stare longingly at men who can’t read my mind. Men who can’t use a sword. Men who can’t wear satin-lined capes and look good doing it. I’m calling for all readers, living and undead, to fight for vampire equality.

And I’m nominating Colin Ames-Beaumont to the be first representative of the “Sexiest Man Alive (and Undead)” for 2007. What separates him from other vampire romance heroes, you wonder? He’s strong, as they are. He sucks blood, as they do. He’s got out-of-control sexual appeal, as they do. But there is one thing, People Magazine, that makes Colin stand out from the rest of the vampire heroes.

Colin … is blond.

But do not take my word for it; judge for yourself. And because he is cursed, unable to see his reflection or to have any pictures taken, the only proof I can offer is in Demon Moon. The book cover cannot do him justice — you must look inside. Want a peek? The first four chapters are here. Or you can buy it at Amazon (it is available June 5 in stores everywhere).

Living and Undead Readers for Vampire Equality

Join the L.U.R.V.E. Train - Because vampires are beautiful people, too.

(Want to join the L.U.R.V.E. Train? Nominate your own vampire, win books and Amazon gift certificates? Climb aboard here.)

…and you get a chance to win every book he’s appeared in.

I’m giving away two sets of my backlist — the trade HOT SPELL, DEMON ANGEL, and WILD THING. To enter, you must choose seven of the following questions, and answer them either on your own blog or here in the comments. (If you answer them on your blog, please be sure to leave a link here in the comments.)

You do not have to answer them as yourself. Feel free to use a character that you’ve created, or one from a book, movie, or television show … just let us know who it is.

I will randomly select two winners from the posts in the comments (so make sure you link if you post on your own blog!) And remember, even if you already have copies of these books, they can make a great gift (or punishment, if you didn’t like them.) The last day to enter will be May 31st, at midnight. Here are Colin’s answers to the full questionnaire:

1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?

A life lived without answering any ridiculous French questionnaires.

2. What is your greatest fear?

Waking up in Chaos.

3. Which historical figure do you most identify with?

The fantastically brilliant and gorgeous figure who inspired an Irishman to give vampires no reflection.

4. Which living person do you most admire?

Might I choose an undead person? If so, it is that fantastically brilliant and gorgeous person who inspired an Irishman.

5. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

This question is absurd.

6. What is the trait you most deplore in others?

Blindness.

7. What is your greatest extravagance?

The time I’ve wasted on questions one to six. I am immortal, but Good God — Children of the Corn: 666 was time and money better spent, and I received it free from Columbia House after purchasing my 1000^th DVD through them.

8. What is your favorite journey?

From San Francisco to Beaumont Court. Then, after my nieces and nephews have chased me round with garlic wreaths and crucifixes for a fortnight or so, I find the journey home even more agreeable.

9. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?

Chastity.

10. On what occasion do you lie?

I never lie.

11. What do you dislike most about your appearance?

Ridiculous question.

12. Which living person do you most despise?

Equally ridiculous question. Why would I bother to expend the energy required to despise a person? It is far more entertaining and gratifying when others despise or fear me. So long as they take a good look at me before cowering or tottering off to their libraries or wherever they sit and contemplate with malice the faces of those they hate, I am satisfied.

13. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

In public company, usually to strangers: “You look lovely tonight, my dear.” In private company, or to myself: “Good God.” “Bloody hell.” “Bloody fucking hell.”

14. What is your greatest regret?

That I did not put Savi to sleep after I drank from her. That I did not take more care that she had no memory of our encounter by the fountain. That, because of my neglect, she will not look at me now.

15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?

I am not certain that I wish to ever find someone I would love more than I do myself. What would come of that love? If it were with a human, I would have to find others to feed from; if a vampire, I could not feed her; and if she were a Guardian…no, that would be impossible. I could never love a self-righteous, lecturing moralist.

16. Which talent would you most like to have?

I am and have mastered everything I should like to be or have mastered.

17. What is your current state of mind?

Thanks to this absurd questionnaire — and specifically, the question numbered fourteen — rather melancholy, and desperately hungry for a bit of Indian curry.

18. If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?

They would be immortal.

19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?

Achievement is such a plebian goal. If I must have an achievement of which to be proud, it is that I have managed to exist two hundred years without achieving anything.

20. If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be?

This is absurd — a thing? What should I be — a pair of trousers? Bloody ridiculous.

21. If you could choose what to come back as, what would it be?

Me.

22. What is your most treasured possession?

A painting of Savi, in Caelum, by the fountain. It is already without compare, and I suspect that in sixty years or so, its value to me will be far beyond priceless.

23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?

Chaos. But ask again in sixty years, or after she marries, and I may have a different answer.

24. Where would you like to live?

San Francisco.

25. What is your favorite occupation?

Hunting. Drinking. Fucking. (They are all the same.)

26. What is your most marked characteristic?

I am exceptionally handsome.

27. What is the quality you most like in a man?

One who is clever, but never one who is more clever than I.

28. What is the quality you most like in a woman?

Curiosity, particularly when her questions are designed to gather information about me. Intelligence. Beauty. A sharp wit and quick tongue. One who speaks honestly and bluntly — no doubt a result of having an adopted brother who can read lies.

29. What do you most value in your friends?

Fine eyesight, and better aesthetic judgment.

30. Who are your favorite writers?

Mary Shelley. John Polidori. (I hope this question refers to the writer as a person, and does not include Polidori’s works — because The Vampyre was utterly ridiculous.)

31. Who is your favorite hero of fiction?

Not that weak-minded fool Aubrey, that’s for certain.

32. Who are your heroes in real life?

I shall never admit it, not to him or his partner.

33. What are your favorite names?

Colin. Emily. Anthony. I have also recently taken a strong liking to names from The Mahabharata.

34. What is it that you most dislike?

Chaos and polyester.

35. How would you like to die?

Never, but if I must, in my daysleep.

36. What is your motto?

Don’t be absurd. Napoleon’s pox-ridden sailors created mottos so as not to be forced to think of anything original to say whilst they drowned. As it was, most of them forgot it at the last moment, and instead remarked upon how bloody brilliant the British Navy was just as the water closed over their heads.

Deadline, upcoming.

Head cold, approaching.

Violence in the story, extreme. Wondering if maybe too much, but still lopping off heads left and right (and top?)

PMS, already here.

Desire to reply to e-mail informing me that a new review of Demon Moon is up, and let the review editor know that her reviewer just rewrote Harriet Klausner’s review, and to respond to another e-mail and point out that Colin is so NOT French that it’s almost funny, and that he’d be mortally offended to be called such, suppressed. (But my PMS apparently doesn’t let me suppress it here; I really wish these sites wouldn’t e-mail me to let me know they’ve reviewed me, because then I just can’t resist looking and *headdesking* My inability to not look is everybody’s fault but my own.)

All the reasons why I love AAR, TRR, Mrs. Giggles, Dear Author, SBTB, and reader blogs, reminded of.

Mountains of books that I want to read due to those reminded-of sites, increasing in height.

Happiness that I’m not part of any internet drama, filling my heart.

…back to lopping off heads.

Okay, I only got six entries, because I probably made it too hard.

So, instead of giving away four copies, I’ll give away six, and everyone’s a winner!

Bonnie Ferguson
Crystal Broyles
May
Janice Young
Jung Ja Ahn
Sue Ahn

Congratulations, everyone!

Okay, I can’t keep up with all of the people on message boards who are hotlinking to Capt Kirk and He-Man, so I had to block all outside access to my image files. Which unfortunately means some legitimate hotlinks (mine, and those who are linking to my covers and stuff) will get blocked, too.

If you end up with a message that says, “Oops! hotlinked, blah blah,” let me know and I’ll send you the link to the pic in imageshack, or just e-mail the picture to you.

While looking for something in an old file today, I ran across some stuff I wrote while I was trying to determine exactly how I would a) get Colin’s backstory across, b) share some worldbuilding information, and c) show what had happened in Caelum, and in the months between the end of Demon Angel and the opening of Demon Moon.

I ended up doing something different than this — but I had originally thought of opening each chapter with an e-mail exchange. Because Savi, she is v. curious, and her constant questions could have been an easy way to explain certain rules. So that’s how these started out … but then I ended up entertaining myself way too much, and these little exchanges would have disrupted the narrative flow of the rest of the novel.

So, as far as I’m concerned, these are in continuity — and they aren’t really spoilers for Demon Moon, because they take place in the in-between time. There are slight spoilers for Demon Angel, however. It’s not much, but…yeah. The title of it should probably be: Savitri Has A Question; or, How Savitri’s Curiosity Slowly Drives Colin Insane.

There are also some early reviews coming in — from loonigrrl (whose reviews I’ve been reading at Amazon for some time, so I’m glad she’s got a blog) and Holly (at The Book Binge, the new-and-improved SF). These may include spoilers. I’ll be putting all of the Demon Moon reviews on their own page pretty soon, along with a place for readers to enter comments and links to their reviews, or to ask me questions about the series/book in a way that’s out there in the open. I’ll link to that as soon as I get it up.

I’m also going to be signing at the Beaverton Powell’s on July 2nd. It will be my first signing, eek! I will have more info as the date approaches, but if you’re related to me, mark your calendars now, because I totally expect you to show up and pretend you aren’t related, and buy lots of copies and say how great my hair looks.

Don’t forget to play for a free copy of WILD THING! The scavenger hunt is up until Friday night.

viktor_57 reviews WILD THING at Amazon (and don’t miss his other reviews).

He very obviously took the info about the novellas that is available on our sites and just rewrote them (but it’s pretty entertaining — the last paragraph is priceless) But as with the commenters who were following Harriet around a while back, I have to wonder at their purpose again — or rather, not their purpose, because obviously they revile the Klausner — but the time and effort they’re taking to stop her. And what does he think this will do? Make her stop reviewing or review differently? Does he plan to use this later, maybe like an “How I became an Amazon top reviewer and got free books without reading a single one!” exposé?

It’s very odd.

And a kind of related question: when did the series names start showing up alongside the books (esp. in anthologies) and how does it get there? Through Amazon or the publisher? ‘Cuz it’d be great to have the series order listed like that, without a reader having to check at my site to see if there are other books in the series.

Below are the links to the anthology’s authors’ websites, blogs, and MySpace pages.

Maggie Shayne’s interview — novella — MySpace
Marjorie M. Liu’s interview — novella — MySpace
Alyssa Day’s interview — novella — MySpace
Meljean Brook’s interview — novella — Myspace

Somewhere hidden in those pages are the answers to the following questions — please look around, answer each question, and send your list of answers to meljean@meljeanbrook.com (SUBJECT: “Scavenger Hunt!) or use the contact form provided at the bottom of the page. The hunt will be open until Friday, May 4th, at midnight (Pacific time).

The prize? Four entrants will be randomly chosen to receive a copy of WILD THING!

1. In the sole trailer made for the anthology, what two items are shown to represent a detective and a veterinarian?
2. Name the book that is an upcoming July release, and serves in place of a photo on MySpace — and the cover is similar to the WILD THING cover…only a whole lot wetter?
3. One of the series represented in the anthology stars heroes who are warriors, and who each wear a warrior’s mark — what shape in the mark represents “knowledge”?
4. Who is the author most likely to run around in a pair of star-spangled underwear, spinning a lasso?
5. Which author was sprinkled with fairy dust, and has an “immortal” series that continues this December with a DEMON’S KISS?
6. Which story kicks off a brand new urban fantasy series, starring a guy who looks an awful lot like MacGyver?
7. Who writes sharp and witty chick lit novels in addition to her paranormal series?

WILD THING RELEASES TODAY!

New York Times bestselling authors Maggie Shayne and Marjorie M. Liu, and sizzling newcomers Alyssa Day and Meljean Brook discover the wild instinct in everyone with four all-new stories of feral heat. Fans will get swept away by the passions in the unfathomable depths of Atlantis; they’ll follow the shadows that stalk both the living and the undead in a world of vampires and guardian angels; they’ll enter the forbidden world of the demon horde and their willing victims; and they’ll be privy to the secrets of a beautiful animal-whisperer who’s drawn closer to the most suspect of all male animals — man.

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For release day, we cooked up a few questions to ask each other, and we’ll each be posting our answers on our blogs. Click here for the scavenger hunt and contest to win one of four copies of WILD THING! 

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Maggie Shayne’s interview
Marjorie M. Liu’s interview
Alyssa Day’s interview

Here are my answers to some really wonderful and fun questions:

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I have a confession to make: I suck at reviews and book commentary. I know if I like a book or not, but am no good at actually explaining why … which is probably a pretty bad problem for a woman who makes her living with words. And I read this book a month ago, about two seconds after I got it, so now the time has passed and I wonder even more if I can do it justice.

But when Jaci Burton said that she had an ARC available to anyone with a blog willing to review, I said to myself: Self, you have a blog, and Self, you really want that book. And then I thought: Self, you can totally write a review. And be articulate and stuff.

So, anyway, I really, really liked this book.

*phew*

Well, that wasn’t so bad! Thanks for the ARC, Jaci!

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