There are bad reviews, and then there's Harriet.
I actually had something different to post today (not a revenge — I’ve decided the sneak attack is the best approach there) but last night this showed up in my inbox, and I started laughing so hard there was no way that I couldn’t not share it with you.
My friends, I’ve been Klausnered.
Pretty much everyone who writes in our genres goes though this rite of passage: getting that review from Harriet Klausner that just isn’t quite right. I’ve had several (one with a spoiler that almost made my head explode) but I’ve never had one quite this…special.
Let us look, shall we? [My comments are in red.]
Four centuries ago, Guardians Irena and Alejandro began to fall in love. [True. Good for you, Harriet.] However, when he made a deal with a demon, she rejected him. [Oh, dear. And you started off so well. It was Irena who made the deal, not Alejandro. Anyway, this is the expected stuff in one of your reviews — so let’s skip to the final paragraph, shall we?]
[…]
The latest Guardians thriller is a well written dark romantic fantasy. [Aw, thank you.] This is a second chance at love battling to survive betrayals as the audience will wonder if the odds are better on the Detroit Lions meeting the Oakland Raiders in the next Superbowl […What? … I … WHAT?]
[…][I don’t really know what the rest says because I’m doing this: Hahahahahahahaha! The Lions? The Raiders? WTF? Hahaha!]
Harriet Klausner
And to cap it off, here is a screenshot of the related links:
Oh, Michael Vick. I had no idea that you were just like Alejandro, but thanks to Harriet, you are forever linked to him. It’s almost like kismet. Except, you know, without the cruelty to animals.
At least she didn’t post any spoilers, though, hmm?
You know, I love reviewers. Seriously. I haunt book review blogs far more than I should, and I’ve gotten my share of negative reviews, which is fine. Not everyone will share my sense of humor about this, either, and so of course not everyone will like my books. But Harriet — she takes it beyond a review into entertainment. And for that, I love her (even if I will never buy a book based on her recommendation).
Also, it doesn’t hurt that she consistently increases the ratings average at every review site. đŸ˜‰
So, I’m wondering — can you think of a review that left you scratching your head and thinking ‘WTF?’ Not a review that you disagreed with, necessarily, but a review where something came completely out of left field (oops, that’s the wrong sport, isn’t it?) and made you laugh? And tell me you’ve seen the reviews for theThree Wolf Moon shirt. The first review is the classic, but the other reviewers have been giving it their all to match it.
In other news, we have winners in the MUST LOVE HELLHOUDS giveaway! Thanks to random.org, the three winners are (the link goes to the comment, so if you aren’t sure it’s you, click to see if you wrote it):
Congratulations! Please contact me with your mailing addresses, and we’ll get those out to you ASAP!
I just have to say, too, that this is our second week at Odd Shots, and I’ve been having a blast. Thank you to everyone who has stopped by and taken a shot. We’ll be here again next week, serving up more.
Finally, for the weekend, I probably won’t get a chance to see these, but I’m dying for:
9, a steampunkish movie from Tim Burton:
and Whiteout, based on a graphic novel by Greg Rucka:
What have you been looking forward to?